So, last week, I came across an item about an armed man “terrorizing” a K Mart. Now, personally, I find K Mart terrifying enough (I’m more the Target type), but the thought of being confronted by a gun-wielding madman far outweighs the benefits of Martha Stewart products. The big irony, though, was that he stole the gun FROM that K Mart!!
Who knew you could buy yerself a pretty polyester pant suit and .22 all in one stop. Now THAT’S white trash, people. The good news is that he didn’t really threaten anybody, he just kind of ran through the store screaming maniacally and “bumping into people.” He did threaten to kill himself before turning himself in to Sheriff’s deputies.
The more I thought about it, though, the more I realized that I could kind of see his point of view. I mean, have YOU ever been to a K Mart? Can you imagine finding yourself at the back of the store, face to face with the gun counter? Large people of questionable hygiene moving about you murmuring appreciative bon mots over the Malaysian manufactured baby clothes, then screaming at their crying child that he “better SHUT up or I’ll give you somethin’ to cry about!!”
I think the guy was just desperate to get the hell out of the store. Can you blame him?