Thursday, April 5, 2007

Lo Siento, Newt.

So Newt Gingrich is sorry he’s a jingoistic, racist, conservative WHITEY. Yeah, me too. For those of you who haven’t been following the misadventures of the Ginja, he basically said last weekend that English should be the “official” language of government in the US. He was talking to the National Federation of Republican Women, so he may have been scouting for wife # . . .wait, what number of wives are we up to again?

Turns out, Gingrich has been secretly studying Spanish. Funny how, whenever Gingrich criticizes something, it usually turns out he’s doing it too, huh? So, once again, he’s forced to apologize.

But get this, after delivering his speech to a room full of giant hair, probably in some posh hotel ballroom, he chose YOU TUBE to deliver is mea culpa---or “lo siento mucho” in his newfound tongue. Nothing like taking it to the people. And to top it all off, he delivered the message in English and Spanish. Newtie, YOU SO COOL!

In his original speech, Gingrich said bilingual education should be replaced by an English language immersion program, “so people learn the common language of the country and they learn the language of prosperity, not the language of living in a ghetto."

What a dumbass. Everyone knows that Hispanics and Latinos live in barrios, not ghettos. Get your minorities straight, White Man!

Gingrich is apparently still harboring hopes of a White House run. Seriously. But before your incredulity meter smacks the ceiling, just remember what most idiot Republicans must think: “Shit, if they’ll elect BUSH twice, I’ve definitely got a shot!”

Latest polls show NG with 9 percent (of likely Republican voters). The poll also showed that 43 percent of Americans view him unfavorably including a third of registered Republicans. Gingrich’s response? “They’re still better than W’s numbers!”

Now, I haven’t heard Mr. G’s statement in Spanish, but I would hope it is better than GDub when he was running for Presidente. At a rally in Houston, the Bush campaign put up a Spanish language banner they believed said, “Together we Can!” which was Bush’s (now ironic) slogan. In Spanish, it should have said “Juntos Podemos.” Unfortunately, it said “Juntos Pedemos,” or “Together we Fart!”

Welcome to the Big Tent party, amigos. Bring a mask.


hokgardner said...

Just when I think things can't get any stupider. . .

hokgardner said...

And speaking of apologies - did you hear Bush's about the attorney firing debacle? He apologized to the "resigned" prosecutors by saying he was sorry that their firing had become politically charged. Wha? That's a non-apology if I've ever heard it.

Anonymous said...

"What a dumbass. Everyone knows that Hispanics and Latinos live in barrios, not ghettos. Get your minorities straight, White Man!"

to quote the sorority girls... "SHA!"