Saturday, August 9, 2008

And you shall know them by the trail of the Cheetohs

Authorities, investigating a snack machine that had been vandalized and emptied, followed the most obvious clue, a trail of orange Cheetoh dust and other “snack debris” to a house just around the corner from the location of the machine.

There they arrested three teenagers for the crime.

Okay, how fucking stoned do you have to be to bust into a vending machine, steal all the shit, but be so munchtastic that you have to start ripping into the Cheetohs RIGHT THEN!

I’m sure had the trail not been so clear, the police could have discovered orange fingerprints all over the place. Then matched them to the orange prints on the bong they’re bound to have found at the boys’ house.

Dude. Everybody knows those snack sizes won’t cure the hunger. Rob a 7-11 next time.

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