Monday, July 28, 2008

Sticking It (Sort of) to Big Oil

Whenever you read about spiraling gas prices, you always see the same rebuttals. “Free market economy,” “Do you know how much they pay in Europe? We’re getting off easy!” blah, blah, blah. What the fuck ever. The big oil companies are using President Crony’s policies to make the largest profits in American history.

But now, they’re doing a little rethinking. As gas prices have dropped twelve cents in the last week, news comes that we, the people, drove a whopping 9.6 BILLION fewer miles in May 08 than we did in May 07. Take THAT, ExxonMobil!

This is being attributed to the exorbitant rise in gas prices. Like, duh.

(Digression: Did anyone else see the report that said “When Hillary Clinton began her presidential campaign (less than two years) ago, gas was $2.00 a gallon?” How fucking scary is that?)

The drop in May was 3.7%, the largest drop in history. Way to go Free Marketers!!! You oil companies go ahead and sell that $4 gas somewhere else, ‘cuz we’re not buying.

I, personally, have felt the impact of these gas prices. My beloved and I play this game called Fantasy For Instance, where we imagine our lives after winning the $100,000,000+ MegaMillions lotto. Now, we find ourselves debating the fuel efficiency of the Maserati Quattroporte vs. the Bentley Continental R. The tricked out Range Rover has been removed from the list entirely. We’re still pretty sure that private jet travel would still be on the agenda, but with a considerable carbon offset expense now. Frankly, it’s exhausting making all these imaginary decisions. I blame big oil.

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