Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Truly Bone Headed

Further stupidity from yours truly. Took the two (remaining) dogs out for their constitutional yesterday. I have to stay in the yard with them because the landscaping is unfinished and there’s a spot they can wriggle under the fence. And by “wriggle” I mean run straight through.

The Runner was actually on the other side of the yard, trying to mind-control our radical insurgent squirrel population. The squirrels were trying to mind-control her right back. My old, slow Little Dog was puttering around on his usual rounds, re-marking the spots he had re-marked only hours before.

I called the two to come in. The Runner immediately headed for the open door, while I walked further down the yard to collect Little Dog. As I returned to the house, I assumed The Runner had headed directly inside.

I collected my things and headed off to my meetings. About three hours later, I walked into the house and was greeted by only one dog. Hmmmm. I wandered through the house, checking closed closet doors and under beds, but no Runner. FUCK!! Could I have possible left her outside? So unlike me. So LIKE a stupid person.

Blech.

Did I mention that this is the pet of our nine year old? Oh, yeah, that’s gonna be fun. “Hey, buddy, want another hamster? Cuz I lost your dog!” FUCK!!

I called and called, but no Runner. So, I set off on foot to scour the neighborhood, an urban area with dense traffic and busy intersections, hoping not to find a furry throw rug in the middle of one of them.

As I left my house, the taco wagon pulled up to offer lunch to the construction workers in my ‘hood. And I heard a bark.

No, the taco people didn’t have my dog! But good Runner had only run a couple of doors down, gotten a bit of exercise and was now ready for one of those delicious smelling tacos.

I was so relieved I almost bought her one.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I must say that the one thing I find confusing about all this bone headed stupidity stuff regarding the walkway through your fence known as the "hole" the dogs escape through, and the fact that it has happened more than once is
WHT THE FUCK HAVENT YOU FIXED IT !!!

O'Pine said...

It's not broken. It's unfinished. We're regrading the yard and adding landscaping and grass and such. Not really an excuse, I suppose I could just put a rock in front of the "hole." But then I'd have to move it every time I open the gate and . . . see . . . I'm turning into a stupid person. AAAARRRGGGHHHHH!