Wonder What the Lesson Plan Said?

The AP is reporting today that a group of teachers from Murfreesboro, Tennessee (which has always seemed like they misspelled it in the first place) staged a mock gun attack on a group of their sixth-grade students during a field trip.

Led by the Assistant Principal Don Bartch (seriously ?!?!?), staff members told the 69 students that a gunman was loose on the state park grounds. The students were instructed to hide under tables and be quiet. They even went so far as to have a teacher in a hooded sweatshirt rattle the door, as if trying to get in.

Naturally, all hell broke loose, with students sobbing hysterically. 11-year-old Shay Naylor said, "I was like, 'Oh My God.’ (real quote) At first I thought I was going to die. We flipped out."

Ya Think?

"We got together and discussed what we would have done in a real situation," said Bartch. Well, dumbass, “in a real situation” the shooter would have hopefully found you first. And, by the way, brainiac, I’m thinking that hiding on the floor and under tables wouldn’t really protect them from a gunman trying to get in. Maybe you could have brought your pet possum and showed the kids how to just “play” dead.

"The children were in that room in the dark, begging for their lives, because they thought there was someone with a gun after them," said one of the parents, Brandy Cole. Again . . . ya think?

The school Principal, Catherine Stephens, “declined to say whether the staff members involved would face disciplinary action, but said the situation ‘involved poor judgment.’" HAHAHAHAHAHA! “Poor judgment?” Way to spin, lady. Who’s your speechwriter, Karl Rove?

You know, I’m always stunned that this caliber of stupidity can come from a group of adults (unless you count the Bush Administration). Did not one of you ignorant motherfuckers stop and say, “Maybe this isn’t such a great idea?” You’re TEACHERS! You are responsible for the safety and well-being of these students. Imagine the levels of therapy they’re going to need! From the looks of things, they barely even have dentists in Murfreesboro, much less therapists! They’ll probably have to go all the way to Nashville for that. And based on the lyrics to most country music, Nashville therapists already have a pretty full plate.

But, my favorite quote from the article was, “Some parents said they were upset by the staff's poor judgment.” WTF?!?!?! SOME parents? I would think ALL the parents would’ve been lining up to open a can of whoop-ass on these people.

At least no one was physically injured. And who knows, maybe we’ll get a couple of country hits out of the deal. Now, what rhymes with “skeered?”